Announcing Focus, Sunshine, and Butterflies

This has been Point A.  And it's been fun.  I think I know where Point B is.  A life filled with focus, love and joy.  And this is how I'm getting there.

www.focussunshinebutterflies.wordpress.com

I'd love to for you to join me there!  

52/52

The Final Song.

I have so much enjoyed spending the last year with you.  I have appreciated your support, your encouragement, your feedback, your comments, your friendship.  All of you.

I have learned a tremendous amount about myself.  Last week when I reread all my posts, my very first post posed the question "what do I want to be when I grow up?"  And what I realized is that I like to help people.  Most jobs I've held have fulfilled that need, starting with my desire to be a firefighter.  Now that never happened, but I did become a training manager and I taught people how to be more effective, how to project and time manage and I loved every minute of it.  My job now includes a lot of help desk type activity.  I don't love that as much, but I do love to solve problems for people.

This last year I have been on a path of self-discovery.  Really digging deep, pushing past invisible boundaries in my head about who I was and who I wanted to be, and realizing that I should have done this years ago.  But time slips away - feeling overwhelmed by the busy-ness of life's demands and always putting it off until tomorrow.  And tomorrow never comes.

Until you develop a blog like this where you feel accountable - not necessarily to anyone but yourself.  Because you don't want to let yourself down.  You don't want to give up.  You don't want to feel like you failed.  But I really do understand now that there is a difference between trying something and failing and failing because you didn't do anything at all.  Mom is in Control's podcast host, Heather Chauvin says "When you take action, that's when the magic happens." And I can't agree with her more.

I would think about my blog and be inspired by something and the wheels would turn in my head. Ideas would float around for a few days and a theme would emerge.  The blog helped me start to see the world differently.  I would look around and really consider how things around me made feel, contemplate the meaning of words, and test theories I had about what I believed to be truth.  Many times I was unexpectedly forced out of my comfort zone, and realizing it wasn't so bad, it started to expand my comfort zone.

So when you start to put all those thoughts, ideas and considerations into action, things change.  You do things you've never done before, you start to trust the whispers in your head - you know - the ones that are there just underneath all the negative thoughts coming from the peanut gallery.  The thoughts, ideas and considerations you give the most focus to tend to be the ones that get stronger.  If you're focused on the negative thoughts and you feed them regularly, they grow stronger and take over.  But if you starve those negative thoughts and ignore them, they become weak and pathetic.  I spent too many years starving and dismissing my positive thoughts that they just plain moved out.  And so I could only get them when they came from someone else - and that's dangerous if it's the only place you are getting them.  So feed your positive thoughts with encouragement, support, and action (which by the way is the most helpful when it comes from YOU).  YOU are the only one that can make YOU happy.  And conversely, YOU are the only one that can make YOU unhappy.

And that reminds me of a quote from Eleanor Roosevelt, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

The biggest thing that I've learned this year is the difference between being a people-pleaser and being someone who sincerely likes to be helpful.  A year ago I would have told you that they are the same thing.  But here's what I've learned: A people-pleaser does things because they want people to like them, they soak up the praise and appreciation, they put a lot of emphasis on what people think of them.  A people-pleaser doesn't always consider the long term consequences of their actions.  A people-pleaser is terrified of judgment.  A people-pleaser can even get desperate for the attention or so caught up in the idea of what they "should" do that they do things they don't want to do.  A people-pleaser tends to, over time, lose who they are because they slowly turn into what they think other people want them to be.

A helpful person genuinely cares about people.  A helpful person sees someone who is hurting or is in need and offers support (which doesn't always equal advice).  A helpful person realizes that they are not expected to fix everyone and everything.  A helpful person considers the bigger picture and when they take action, they do so because they want to.  A helpful person is a friend, someone who listens more than they speak and can be counted on regardless if praise is given.  A helpful person is true to themselves.

So as my Project 52 ends, I want to say thank you for riding along on my journey.  Thank you for cheering me on.  Thank you for helping me see who I wanted to be.  So tell me, what was your favorite post from the last year? I'd love to know.  This was mine.

And that is my favorite post, I think, because it highlights the ideas of focus, perspective and feeling like you have no idea what happens next.  Do you know why I could never answer the "what do I want to be when I grow up" question? Because, for crying out loud, I didn't know what I wanted.  I only knew what I thought I should be and what other people thought I was.  I wasn't focused.  And if you think about that in terms of photography, everything else around me was clear, but I was fuzzy (like the barn through that dirty window).  You could kind of tell it was me, but the detail was missing.

Stay tuned later this week for the announcement of what comes next.  I'll warn you, it's going to be a little different than this last year's Project 52.  And I sincerely hope you like it.  But you know what? If you don't, that's totally okay.  I won't lose sleep, I won't try to morph it into something that I think you will like.  I won't even feel bad about it.  Because I'm doing this for me.   And because I can't please everyone.

an equally belated 18/52

Confused about my blogpost title?  Check out my post from a couple weeks ago.

So as I bring this Project 52 to a close, I reread all my posts from start to finish.  Aside from sounding a bit schizophrenic, I feel like a lot has happened, a lot has changed. And it was little bit like watching your life on fast forward.

I tried to really focus on what was important to me.  How in the world do you stay focused, how do you stay on track, with all the distractions buzzing around?  There's so many things to do, places to go, kids to drop off and pick up! So many things in our lives that are calling for our attention.

I don't know about you (but please tell me!), but for me, it's "out of sight, out of mind." Like that quilt kit that Brian let me buy when we went to Door County for our 15th anniversary. It has all the pieces and patterns all picked out for you.  You just need to cut and sew them together.  I've laid it all out, I've looked at it, I bought stuff to get started, but there it still sits next to my bedside table - all sad-like - next to my bed. Brian and I just celebrated 18 years.  It's been three years.  Three.  Years.

It sits there because I don't have time.  So how do you make time for things that are important to you but not urgent?  When I think about my job, everything is a priority - and most of what I do is deadline-driven.  So whatever needs to get done first gets done.  Even if it would be better for me to be thinking about and planning in advance for a future deadline.  And then after that deadline, it's onto the next urgent deadline.

And there just aren't many situations where making a quilt is considered urgent. And so it waits. Because the dishes need to be done.  The kids need clean clothes.  The refrigerator isn't going to fill itself!  All these little things that need to be done and can often be time and energy consuming.

For the last few months, I've been gearing up for the annual conference for the company I work for. So I'm in Las Vegas right now.  I've been here two other times; once when I was 21 and then my company brought me out here in 2012 to see this conference in action.  I forgot how loud and bright and crazy the casinos are.  Noise and lights come in from every direction.  You usually don't see any clocks and the outside world is not visible. I think this is very deliberate.  So you get sucked into the black hole of distraction.

The hotel is connected to the casino.  And as you leave the casino and enter the hotel, you see this beautiful serene waterfall.

Normally this space is FILLED with tourists taking pictures - and one night, there was even a bride and groom in front of the waterfall for photos.  It was beautiful.  The only way I could get this shot is because I was up and downstairs at 5:00 a.m.  The coffee shops weren't even open yet.  There were, however, people STILL in the casino that appeared to still be there from the night before.

 

And look - there is even a bridge!

It's been a busy conference.  There has been a lot of work to do - stuff that should have been done ahead of time, but I just couldn't get to it.  After I was done working yesterday, I stepped outside for the first time last night.  It was like an OVEN.  Y'all, I am NOT exaggerating.  And the inside of the convention center is kept at just above freezer temperatures.  Knowing this, I packed for Winter. Speaking of Winter (as in Winter is Coming), I haven't seen the Game of Thrones finale yet - it's been SO busy!!  

And considering I've only been outside once, the waterfall and bridge are beautiful to see - even though I'm sure a lot of the plants are fake.  They are doing their best to bring the outside in for the people who actually never get outside - whether they are working a conference or enjoying the casino.  

On a completely different note, today is an exciting day - Isaac's tenth birthday!!  

He's definitely not a baby anymore (I feel like I say that every year) now that he is ten.  But he'll always be my baby.  He is so sweet and thoughtful and kind and so much like Brian and me.  He's definitely ours - no question.  

Love you Isaac!!  :)

A very belated 17/52

How long can you go - asking yourself the same questions, wanting to do something, wanting to change something, wanting to make a difference or make something happen - before you realize that the only person that can do it, change it, make it happen is YOU?  And it has to start with you.  You may be inspired by someone else, but any action that will get you on that path has to be taken by YOU.  And maybe you don't feel like you are big enough, strong enough, smart enough, responsible enough, whatever enough.  But if you want undercover mermaid highlights in your hair, you need to save your money and call and make an appointment.  That is the only way it will happen.  I promise you that there are no undercover-mermaid-highlight fairies that will fly over you while you are sleeping and do it all for you.  

If you want to learn to sing like Taylor Swift or Avril Lavigne, then you are going to need to practice and maybe even save your money to get voice lessons.  And then practice some more.  A whole lot more.  Even if you pay for the best voice coach, you will have to put in the time and effort.  And you may feel like you are nowhere near as good as they are, but it doesn't matter - you have to start SOMEwhere.

If you want to run a marathon (and let's be clear, I DON'T), you are going to have to get off the couch and run.  Even if it's a short distance - but the key is consistency.  There is just no other way.  It won't happen overnight, it won't be easy, it may hurt - but you do it because the results are rewarding.  You have a sense of accomplishment.  You achieve your goals.  You feel good about yourself, about life - and you move on to the next big thing!

So don't let your doubt, your excuses, your procrastination, or your fear hold you back.  Take one little tiny step in the right direction.  And then take another one.  And another.  And pretty soon you're walking across the flo-oo-oor.

Trust that you can do this.  Whatever it is.  Trust that all the 'what if's' and 'what about's' will line up when they need to.  Believe in the process.  Believe in yourself.


And then you can quote Joyce Meyer and say “I may not be where I need to be but I thank God I am not where I used to be.”

And you should take one little tiny baby step today.  Because if you procrastinate too long, it may be too late.  Because life is fragile people.  Tomorrow is not guaranteed.  And if you do get a tomorrow and all your tomorrows accumulate and then before you know it, you are 39 years old and getting magenta and turquiose highlights in your hair.  And older brothers are making fun of you.  LOL

51/52

Okay, I am seriously laughing hysterically over here.  I have been trying to figure out how I started my blog on July 7 with "My Story" and then week one on July 14 - and how in the world is it June 11 and I'm on week 51???  Something is not adding up here!

And so there it is...

I can't believe that I didn't catch that.  It sounds a lot like me, though.  Once, when I was teaching Pound, I was counting out a stretch that needed to be held for 8 seconds, and said, "5, 7, 8 - what??"  I hate to say that I'm terrible at math, but oh, if this isn't a perfect example, I don't know what is.


You know who is good at math?  My niece, Ashley, and my cousin, Melissa.  Apparently, I need some tutoring.

Thank goodness I have smarter people in my life.  Like Brian.  Saturday, he was at the Illinois Trucking Association Tech Competition.  Isaac and I got to watch a little bit of it.

Brian doing a "pre-trip" around the truck.

There were 32 smarty-pants mechanics in the competition this year.  They had seven stations where their knowledge was tested on things like engine diagnostics, tires and wheels, and other mechanical things.  There were things that were wrong or broken on the truck that Brian was looking at and he had to be able to identify them all.  A headlight was out - that's about all Isaac and I could figure out.  We would have gotten one point.

The mechanics had about 25 minutes per station.  At the station previous to this one, Brian was done in 9 minutes.  He didn't win the competition, but he learned a lot!


And while he golfed in the afternoon with his mechanic buddies, Isaac and I washed my car and vacuumed it out.  Two horse shows two weeks apart = lots of sand and dirt in and on the car.

We visited the farmers market by our house and found these.

We also grilled and ate outside.

Johnsonville Cheese and Bacon Brat Burger on the back deck.

I love summer.

P.S. Today is our 18th wedding anniversary!  We celebrated last night with sushi - because it's not really a celebration without sushi. Love you, Brian! 

50/52

Wow.  Week 50.  My "Project 52" is almost finished.  I can't believe I got this far!

What happens next??

Oh my gosh, seriously, I don't know.  I have two weeks to figure it out.  14 days.  I'm feeling like I need to engage "Project 14" so that I can brainstorm ideas, create a vision and a plan and then implement it.  LOL

I could just keep doing what I'm doing.  I could do something similar.  I could do something more challenging - I mean, that was kind of the point for this.  To challenge myself to use my camera more often - to get out of automatic mode and work on taking pictures in manual mode, where you have a little more control over the settings.

Or I could do something completely different.  But what??

Completely different can be scary.  What if it doesn't turn out to be a good idea?  What if it just plain sucks?  What if I do it all wrong?  What if no on likes it?  What if no one reads it?

These are the voices in my head.  And they can be so loud - so hard to ignore.  SO ANNOYING! So I yell, "SHUT UP!" (I think this may the only time my mom would forgive me for saying that) and hope that because that is generally startling, that those voices will pipe down for once.

And I don't think that it's necessarily that those voices are mean or malicious.  They just want to keep me safe.  They want to keep me from experiencing failure, rejection, disappointment, and frustration.  Things that I don't really enjoy feeling.  And what better way to do that than to have me just stay right where I am, in my comfort zone, doing everything the way I've always done it (and with the corresponding results).  So if the voices can stop me from experiencing all those seemingly negative feelings, they have so much less work to do.  And they like it that way because they are LAZY.

I think back to the last few times I've tried something new and I was scared and it didn't go exactly the way I planned.  I had to talk myself off the ledge.  The voices in my head had to reassure me that it was going to be okay, that the world wasn't going to end because of this, that no one was going to think less of me.  That is SO MUCH WORK for them.

And they would just rather be tuned out watching Youtube videos like this one: Fenton the dog!

And yesterday, at the Tower Hill Stables Schooling Show, these awesome girls from Escapar Farm pushed beyond any scary thoughts about being on large horses and jumping over fences.

Hannah and Ruby

Emma and Savannah

Maggie and Indie

Halsey and Riley

Lexi and Riley

Lauren and Rango

Our girls did an amazing job at the show this weekend.  And while observing other riders and trainers, I think A LOT of that has to do with our trainer, Tasha.  She is encouraging; offering reminders (and sometimes multiple reminders) to the girls in a direct way, but without insulting them, belittling them, or making them feel bad.  And I think that Tasha does a great job of pushing them out of their comfort zone (like asking Emma to participate in a more challenging event that she wasn't planning to - where she ended up winning first place!) and feeling confident that they can handle it.

P.S. Georgia, I'm so sorry I didn't get any pictures of you on Savannah this time!  I promise to next time!  :)

49/52

Happy Summer!!

Emma has a big week this week!  Last weekend was the first horse show of the series and she and Savannah did great!

Emma and Savannah schooling for the derby. Photo credit: Koch R Lee

Emma and Savannah warming up first thing in the morning on Sunday.

She also graduated from eighth grade on Wednesday evening, making me the mom of two high school girls.   Oh my.

Look at how big her smile is!

To kick off summer, we went camping.  I should tell you, though, it isn't really camping.  My mom and Papa invite us up to their place - with air conditioning, a shower, real beds and a full kitchen.  So I'm calling it camping, but the only thing campy about it is the campfire and the s'mores.

We approve of the new square shaped marshmallows! 

The forecast at the end of last week for the weekend was bleak.  It was calling for rain, storms, wind - not very fun weather for camping - even for my altered version of camping.  So we were really expecting to be cooped up inside the trailer all weekend with movies and games.  And we've had plenty of those kinds of Memorial weekends before - and we've made the best of them.  But other than a short downpour on Saturday evening, the weather this weekend was fantastic!

Abbey (yes, we have changed the spelling.  Again.) and Zoey (who has never changed the spelling of her name).

We woke up Sunday morning so excited because Alexis was joining us for the day.  So we painted birdhouses, went to the beach, played four square, and jammed in as many campy activities as we could while she was there!

Alexis and Abigail enjoying the sun.  I love that you can see the clouds in the reflection of their sunglasses.

And even though the water temperature was as cold as the ice in a cooler at the lake, we still enjoyed the beach. I mean, look at this smile.  

My nephew, Luke!

This is the best start to every summer.  My mom and Papa feed us amazing food, we play games and have so much fun!  

Jacob, Luke, Emma, Gramma, Abbey, Isaac and Alexis

So so so many thanks to my mom and Papa for hosting all of us!!  :)

48/52

Happy Monday people!  What a fantastic and summery weekend we had! 

Do you know who this girl is?

As you can see from the red digital date on the photo, this was taken in June, 1999.  Almost 17 years ago.  

She had just graduated from kindergarten and we all went to Colonial Cafe for ice cream to celebrate.  Because when you are the first grandchild, everything gets celebrated.  LOL  Brian and I had gotten her some little gifts to kick off the summer right.  Including these goggles. 

This same girl, my niece Alexis, graduated from William Rainey Harper College on Saturday.  She studied to be a paralegal, and has a full-time paralegal position at a law firm where she has been a receptionist and intern for a while now.

This girl is my oldest niece - an absolute ray of sunshine in our family.  She has mastered the art of making you feel like you are the most important person in the room - and that she has been waiting far too long to see you.  Her personality is larger than life - she throws herself fully into everything she does. 

She is silly and honest and she works hard.  And even though she has been through a lot - missing almost half of her sophomore year in high school due to a severe and largely unexplained illness - she perseveres, has a contagious laugh and is absolutely adorable.  She's unapologetically passionate and fights for what she believes in, which is why it's so great that she is in the field that she's in.  It's perfect for her.

So watch out world, Alexis has her Starbucks, her new Michael Kors handbag and she is HERE.

And I'm so proud to be her Auntie.   :)

I was very excited to appear taller than her in this photo, but then I realized I was wearing heels and she was not.  

47/52

This weekend, Carly and I went to my aunt and uncle's lake house in Wisconsin.  The original vision was to take advantage of the Friday the 13th and do scary stories, a campfire and s'mores on Friday night.  It was cold and rainy, so there was no campfire, no scary stories and no s'mores.  There was, however, Noodles and Company, margaritas and The Devil Wears Prada.  Just as good, right?

Carly is vegan, so eating with her can be tricky.  We did realize that we were very close to Milwaukee and she had been to a cute Mexican place, called Cafe Corazon, that served a mexican brunch - with a few vegan options.  This is a luxury for Carly.  She often gets one choice on a regular restaurant menu that she can eat.

Bloody Mary & Pink Grapefruit Margarita (photo credit to Carly)

After we enjoyed brunch, we went to the Mitchell Park Domes. It was a cold and windy day - the high temperature was only 48 degrees.  Silly us for thinking that because it was the middle of May that we might have warmish weather to be able to spend time outside. 

There are three domes, but only one was open - the Show dome.  The domes are conservatories, climate-controlled environments for plants of all kinds.  The whole concept of a conservatory allows plants and flowers to grow and thrive, be protected from the elements and receive a maximum amount of sunshine.

All the conditions inside the dome were perfect - a little warm, a little humid and lots of space for the flowers to grow.  There was even a spot for the garden fairies.

We knocked on the door, but no one was home.

It was a beautiful place.  The colors were bright and vibrant.  It was calm and peaceful inside the dome.  Even with the small waterfall at one end of the pool, the water was remarkably reflective.

This place gave me an idea.  I need to have an environment for myself that creates an atmosphere of growth.  

After the domes, we decided to go on an adventure to the Mary Nohl House in Fox Point.  Mary, who passed away in 2001, was long thought of as a witch while she independently lived, spending 50 years transforming her yard into a sculptured work of art.  One article I read said this: "She was a single woman in society who carved her own path.  It is no coincidence that she was labeled a witch."

Little did we know that it is currently under construction, which means all the statues are protected and covered with plywood.

Fox Point Art Yard - Under construction and due to reopen in the Fall of 2016.

What you can't see in this picture is that this house is situated FEET from Lake Michigan.  Just past the left frame of this photo is the lake.  What an amazing and inspiring location for a unique home like this.

I could focus on the disappointment of the weather, the two domes being closed, or the "witch's house" being under construction. Our day didn't go according to plan.  I could have allowed it to ruin the whole weekend. 

Not a very beachy shoreline of Lake Michigan

Or I can focus on the beauty and the strength of the flowers in the conservatory.  Focus on the idea that if I can surround myself with sunshine and keep myself protected from the elements, get grounded in good soil, I can grow too.

I can focus on the journey - the adventure.  How we got there.  What we saw.  What we learned.  What revelations we had.  The beauty in the small things.  The courage we had to just get where we were.  The way we started to see ourselves differently.

I can focus on the idea that maybe Carly and I were supposed to go to the Mary Nohl House, even if we didn't get to see the sculptures.  To see that she left her mark on the world - and how she did it - despite the open criticism and doubt from others.  She believed in what she was doing, and that was enough for her.  And while a flood damaged the home in 2010, it was being renovated - the sculptures being protected on the outside, and more of her art being protected on the inside, so that the pieces that she created with love and available resources can be shared once again.

46/52

I hope that everyone had a wonderful Mother's Day!  Ours was fabulous!

We had gorgeous weather all weekend and we took advantage of it, for sure!  Which is why I'm doing laundry today.  There was no way I was staying indoors to do laundry. 

On Saturday, Isaac wanted to show off his skateboarding skills at the skate park.  He'll be ten this year.  I can't believe how much he has grown up.  Every mom must go through this, but it seemed like only yesterday he was toddling around with his blanket and his thumb in his mouth reciting the words to "How Do Dinosaurs Say Good Night?"  And today he going down ramps with amazing courage.

Sunday, Brian let me decide what we did for the day. So we walked around Fabyan Park before lunch at Portillo's so I could enjoy cheese fries and a slice of chocolate cake.  There were lots of opportunities to stop and take pictures.  And no one complained!  :)

I'm too cool to smile, Mom.

All my children :)

Yes, we brought Zoey.  Brian didn't want to - he knows that strangers cause her a lot of anxiety and he doesn't like to voluntarily put her through that, but I pulled the "it's my day" card and she got to go with us. 

What are YOU looking at?

For the most part, everyone got along.  There was a tiny dandelion incident, but once we took care of that, everyone enjoyed each others company.  The sisters were silly and fun to photograph. 

Abbi had her first behind-the-wheel driving experience this weekend.  Talk about growing up.  About an hour before her lesson, we sat in the Highlander.  We moved the seat, the mirrors and identified all the important gauges and gadgets.  Her instructor said that she did an amazing job - driving on some "big" roads doing 45 miles per hour.  I'm hoping she gets her driving skills from Brian instead of me.  If you know me, you know that I'm a great driver, unless there are other cars around.  Then it's questionable. 

Emma and Elpida

After lunch, I went with Emma to the barn.  She was asked to ride two horses.  I love that she is trusted by horse owners to do this.  These horses are large and can be forceful, but with Emma they are gentle and respectful.  It's amazing to watch how they respond to her.  Emma used to be a very quiet and meek child, sometimes I could barely hear her.  But with the horses, she has to speak up - and she does.  Her confidence has grown and she never turns down an opportunity to ride. 

And so while she was tacking them up and rehydrating and untacking them, I got to love them and pet them. 

Friday night when we picked up Emma from the barn, she took Carly and I back to the paddock to see some of the horses.  As the sun was setting, Savannah and Emma made a wish with the dandelion.  Well, right after I took this picture, Emma made a wish; Savannah ate it. 

Many thanks to all of my family, especially Brian, for making my day so special.  I love you so much!!

45/52

Can I be honest with you?

The amount of mental energy required to write this blog is almost more than I can handle today.  But I intended to get this written before Monday, so here I am.

It's Spring.  The rain ALL day yesterday confirms it.  But the flowering trees are gorgeous.  You really have to enjoy them while you can, because they don't last nearly long enough.  I find that I often take these blooms for granted - and then miss them terribly when they are gone. 

When someone asks about my favorite flower, I can't name just one.  Gerbera daisies, black-eyed Susans, sunflowers and dandelions are at the top of my list.  There is a common theme here.  They are all yellow.  Is that a coincidence, do you think?

I don't think it's a secret that I love dandelions.  I even love the way the word looks and how it sounds.  Dandelions. Dan-de-lions.  Say it out loud and tell me that it doesn't sound lovely.  

They are amazing little things really, blooming a beautiful yellow color until they mature.   And then the magic happens.  The yellow flower turns into a white fluffy seed head.  The seed head is a bunch of little parachutes for the seeds.  And once you make your wish or the wind blows, those parachutes fly away, carrying those little dandelion seeds all over.  You can't tell me that isn't incredible.  I mean, what other flower can you make wishes on??

But then there are people, like Brian, who spend all summer keeping dandelions out of their yards.  Because technically, Brian reminds me every Spring, dandelions aren't flowers, they are weeds.  What??!!  How can weeds be so beautiful, so magical, full of hopes and dreams??  How can they deceive you into thinking they are wonderful and amazing flowers, but they are not??

But Wikipedia does confirm that they are weeds - like the ones that choke the life out of the grass or gardens around it.  And if you make a lot of wishes, then you will end up with hundreds of dandelions soon.  Which is good in my opinion, but infuriating for Brian, since he is the one in charge of the yard and has to pull them all out by the root.  That's the only way to get rid of the weeds.  Because if you leave any parts of the root there, it will grow back - with a vengeance.  Regular maintenance and hard work is what it takes to make your lawn or garden healthy and weed-free.  If you ignore it, it will get out of control, and the weeds will take over.

Which brings me to this adorable, unassuming house.  It's charming (and I see they have a few wish-making creations in their yard), but it's what is on the SIDE of the house that I'm in love with.  

There are so many things about this that I love.  First of all, what a canvas!  The side of your house.  The second thing that I love is that it's intentional.  This side of the house doesn't look like the rest of it.  And third, they used this canvas to display words of wisdom.  For people like me walking by to enjoy and take in. 

"Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities." ~Voltaire

"Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored." ~Aldous Huxley

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter." ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

"When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace."  ~Jimi Hendrix (although with a little research, it seems he may not have been the originator of this quote).  

So even though I can try to ignore the fact that dandelions are weeds, they are still weeds.  And maybe it's the idea of dandelions that I love more than anything.  That you can make wishes and put all your energy into hoping they come true.  But that's just a fairy tale - it's not the truth.  Because the fact is, if you're wishing for something, you're gonna have to speak up and do work to make it happen. 

Do you have any words of wisdom that you live by??

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This week I got to spend some time in Florida with my very good friend, Nicole.  Nicole and I went to the same high school and sang in choir together.  We hadn't kept in touch after high school, but about 6 years ago, her daughter and my little guy, Isaac, were in the same preschool class.  Isaac had a speech delay, but oh, how he loved to talk about Emilie.  Whether or not Emilie liked him as much as he liked her, I'll never know, but she was so kind and polite to him.

It always surprises me how small the world really is.  That she and I would have moved to this area at the same time, and had our children enrolled in the same preschool class.  She recognized me one day after class and we have been close ever since.

Neither of us have ever done a "girls getaway" before.  Between work and kids and all kinds of responsibilities and juggling schedules, it just seemed impossible.  But finally, we sat down, compared calendars and made it happen.

 
And I'm so glad we did.  We had absolutely NO agenda.  No responsibilities.  No one to take care of but ourselves.  We got up each morning, had breakfast and then put on our suits and sat at the beach ALL afternoon.  We read, we talked, we enjoyed the view from the beach chairs.  We reapplied sunscreen, we listened to the waves crash against the rocks and we talked some more.  When we had enough, we showered and went to dinner.  After walking along the boardwalk, we went back to our room and then fell asleep so we could do it all again the next day.

There were these groups of large rocks spaced out on the shoreline - I'd say every 50 - 60 feet or so.  I'm not sure why they were there, but they were beautiful.  Couple that with the blue sky and the turquoise waters and that view from the beach chairs was breathtaking.  It's hard not to contemplate life while you are sitting on a beach with one of your very best friends with a view of the ocean and the sound of the waves.  The things that matter most to you start to really come into focus.  Thoughts about your dreams and hopes and goals roll in and out like the waves.  You start to really think about how decisions you've made along the way have shaped your life and affected those around you.  You start to forget the complexity of your troubles, and the vision for your life seems so simple, so obvious, and so achievable. 

There was no way to resist climbing on some of the rocks to take pictures.

And maybe that's what relaxing is supposed to do.  Give you time and space to recharge your batteries so you can go back to your real life and face things head on and make changes where changes need to be made.  Give you that opportunity to reflect on what's happening in your life and think about what's working and what's not.  And then give you the chance to dream those big dreams.

The waves were fairly large every day we were there.  But on the last day, the rip current was dangerous, so they put up a Danger sign.  I will admit - the tide was higher, the waves were bigger and it was windier than any of the other days we were there.  The ocean looked chaotic, tumultuous and not the pretty turquoise color we had seen yesterday and the day before.

I felt like the sign was a warning - "You're about to go back to your real life, be prepared!"  Both Nicole and I felt like we were thrust back into reality once we stepped out of the black Suburban that brought us home.  Unpacking, doing laundry, and figuring out what to make for dinner stared at us as we walked in the door.  But armed with three days of relaxing in the sunshine with palm trees, we were ready to stare right back. 


Before we left, we found a group of rocks that would be easy to climb to take a few pictures.  This was my favorite of Nicole.  

Nicole is one of those down-to-earth people that I can tell anything to and she gets it.  She is absolutely beautiful, inside and out.  It's impossible not to love her.  She genuinely cares for people.  She is easy-going and fun to be around.  It's obvious that her family is important to her; Nicole and I helped Emilie with centimeters, meters and millimeters (I think?) homework and I adored hearing her read the bedtime devotional to her kids before bed each night.

She and I are both directionally challenged so it must have been a treat for anyone watching us get off the elevator when we started to walk in the wrong direction, or tried to find our rental car in the wrong parking lot.  We laughed, we cried, we talked, we listened and we sat in silence.  We aren't afraid to ask each other the hard questions.  You know, like, "Where are we going for dinner?"

Love you, Nicole, and thanks for being by my side this week.  :)